ecosopher

So the body which I must join to be able to take a job not only charges RIDICULOUS* fees for the service it provides (which is what, exactly?) but also takes four weeks to complete the registration.  Four weeks.  Considering registering its members seems to be its primary function, what can possibly take that long?  The police clearance is two weeks, at most.  All the rest is their administrative stuff - I supply the copies of academic records, so they don't have to source those either.  Speaking of academic records, UWA's came in the mail today, but Murdoch's hasn't arrived, and that's kind of the important one :/  I rang them 5 times today, left a message once, but never managed to get through, nor did they return my call, as promised.  I'm Not Impressed.  Obviously I don't have a guaranteed position so I can't really kick up, but I'm a whole lot less attractive as a candidate if I can't work for another month.  By that time the term will be half over.  Not to mention the fact that we will be seriously running low on funds. 

*sigh*

I'll get in touch with my learned friends at school tomorrow and see if there's a way to get around this.  I'm hoping to be able to get on the phone to Murdoch in the morning, and if I can't, we'll be driving down to pick up the transcript in person - a good two hour round trip, which is kind of irritating, but looking on the bright side, which I generally like to to... at least we don't have to do it on public transport, because that would make it an all-day ordeal.  

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I am drinking chai right now.  Not exactly authentic chai, just milk tea with a cinnamon stick and a few cloves and bruised cardamom pods in it :) but it's really, really good.  I had the idea when M was making a milk milo the other day, and now I think I may be addicted.

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General garden activity:

- Strawberries are doing well, and we'll probably be able to pick the first this week.  Potatoes aren't up yet, and I'm not sure they will make it, as it's almost certainly a bit too warm for them, but we'll see.  Sunflowers are stretching out of the soil as fast as they can, along with the amaranth we planted in between.  S is ecstatic that the seeds are sprouting.  I'm pretty chuffed, myself.

- I bought some lawn substitutes the other day.  Some pennyroyal and some other herbs.  I've planted two, and will see how they do.  If they do well, I'll see if I can get some landscaping trays to make it cheaper, plant them at strategic spots and let them spread.  They have to be better than the lawn we have, after all.  Plus they don't need mowing :D  On Friday I'll try and take some shots and put them on, so I can have a record of how they're spreading.

- I'm trying to give away my bokashi bucket.  If nobody on ALS wants it I'll put it on freecycle.  We don't use it and someone might as well.  I could conceivably get money for it, but it's old and I don't feel right asking for payment - we got it on a good deal, anyway, so it's not like I paid full price for it.

- I've drawn up a plan for the front and back gardens.  The native tubies I've bought recently, I've repotted into larger pots, and in about 6 weeks I'll plant them out into the garden.  By that stage they'll hopefully have grown up a little, because I'm getting rid of a few things and it will make the garden look a little bare at the back/closest to the house.  But dafür will it be neater :)  In the back garden, I'm going to plant bamboo :)  I love bamboo.  I can't wait to grow it.  I just haven't decided which (clumping) one to get.  Might be another job for Friday.
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General family life:

- S (having smeared yoghurt all over his watermelon rind):  "Mummy, I'm finished now.  I'm getting down.  I'm in control, Mummy."
  (Not sure if he was talking about his ability to get down off the chair, or life in general).

- When I asked T if she would like some yoghurt, she said, "Yes, please!"  Personally, I think she's remarkably gifted when it comes to speech, for an almost-18-month-old.  From my obviously completely objective perspective, of course.  She has over 50 words and has learnt to say her name :) 

- Daily, T demonstrates her sense of humour.  She loves hiding, and running out to say "Boooooo!" and when she's finished her milk at night, she comes to give the bottle back, but at the last minute will run away, laughing.  It's fantastic fun.

- M is a bit down at the moment.  My not working for potentially another month hasn't helped.  I know we'll be OK, but it's frustrating to be eating away at our savings.  The plan was, we'd use the redundancy to get ahead a bit, because M would find a job pretty much straight away.  Not much we can do, except be grateful that we even had a buffer in the first place.  And continue to cuddle a lot.

- I had a little weep when I had to ring up the FAO to tell them I would be applying for benefit (I'm almost certain I will get paid work quite soon, but it would be unwise to assume that, and then have to wait to be approved for payment, leaving us even less financially able than we are now).  I was fine on the phone, but as I told M later how I'd felt going from "full time carer for my children" to "unemployed and actively looking for work"... the feeling of uselessness and hopelessness which comes from that word - unemployed - and the implication that I'm no longer caring full time for my children, it just really all crashed around me.  And even though I know it's a label for them to use so that they can pay me, and that I am looking for work, and that I still got up at 12, 2, 4 and 5 this morning to care for my children(!) it still wrenches me inside.  And even though I don't really like to break down in front of the children, so they were in the loungeroom while we were having a cup of tea in the kitchen, S looks over and calls to me, "Don't worry Mummy.  I'll look after you."  He's said that a bit lately, to me mostly, but also to M.  Sometimes it's a little uncanny, how perceptive they are...

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Just put the nappies on to wash.  Time for bed.  Washing up can wait for the morning.



*Ok, so the fees are just under $200.  I know that many other organisations charge far more, and really, $200 is not that excessive, but bear in mind that we are less than wealthy at this point, and I'm registering on the chance of work, rather than a guaranteed salary.  So it makes a difference.  Plus I find dealing with them annoying to the point that it makes me impotent with rage.  Really. 

Some of my education prepared me (the bit where I studied Education) for the specific job I've done recently/ may do again this year.  I went into it hoping I would be able to have solid employment and an average wage, and I ended up really enjoying it.  So that was a bonus.  

The other degrees have been beneficial in less tangible ways, but I'm very grateful to have done them.  I remember stuff way after I've read or heard it, so it's kind of cool that I'll be listening to someone, and they'll mention something, and I'll have the backstory already.  Then again, it means that I tend to be a bit of a smart-arse. 

And if I had the time and money, I would be back at school as soon as my chubby little legs would carry me.  I would still like to do my PhD :)  but right now, the children demand priority.  When they're a bit older, out of nappies, that kind of thing, then I'll look into it.

At the end of a busy day, when children have spent their only day in daycare and are subsequently exhausted and manic, and you are a little frazzled from a useless appointment at the job network whatsit (more on that later) and not having finished the food shopping, do not, repeat DO NOT take aforementioned children with you to the supermarket to complete said food shopping.  Only disaster can ensue.  Which it did.  And I had to use lollipop, of all things, to bribe S to walk near me and not race off around the aisles, narrowly avoiding other shoppers, who, to their credit, generally seemed to find him endearing.  Fools.  Or perhaps I am the fool, for taking them into the shop, and their smiles were of a vindictive, mocking nature.


Aaaanyway.  Job thingo.  M and I decided, after much soul-and-job searching, that I'll try and find work for a while, and he can be Stay At Home Dad.  This will be interesting, on both fronts.  I emailed some colleagues from school and am hopeful of something parttime - the email was being a little dodgy tonight so I'll see what happens about that tomorrow.  There are a couple of other jobs I coiuld see myself doing.  The most amusing things was looking through on seek last night; the jobs are listed with job title, company, and then often a few dot points to give some idea of what's involved, or what's attractive about the job.  One made me laugh out loud- the final point was "Have fun on casual Fridays!"  Seriously.  The opportunity to wear my own clothes (and pay for the privilege, to boot) is not exactly a drawcard when it comes to choosing my next place of employment.  Perhaps that also says more about the nature of my casual clothes (ie, not really suitable to wear anywhere except the garden).

So, I'm fairly OK with the whole job thing, as long as it happens soon.  I'm less enthralled about the idea of being unemployed and having to go to C'link appointments, etc.  Fingers firmly crossed that I'll have something by my birthday...

Now, to bed.

I still do things I regret.  Often, several times a week - sometimes several times in the one day, though, admittedly, that would be a bad day.  My biggest regret is giving up a free ticket to see Heinz Holliger, then one of the best oboists in the world, to go to my host sister's birthday party, because I thought the boy I liked and was sort-of-going-out-with would be there.  He wasn't, I had a pretty ordinary time, and I should totally have gone to see the oboist.  Blergh.

But... I guess there could be bigger regrets.  So in the scheme of things, I can live with that one. 

This is what has been going on lately, in no particular order:

- We tried a new Indian takeaway, Koh-i-noor (named after the diamond) and it wasn’t bad.  It did have peas in the rice, which I found a little odd, but still yummy.  Just not quite as good as Agni.  It’s just Agni is just that little bit too far away to make it worth it ... well, it’s always worth it, but it’s such an investment in time and fuel that most of the time we can’t justify it.  Plus they’re expensive. 

- Finally we’re getting to a good place with S’ sleeping.  I’m attempting to stretch T out so that they nap together during the day (she goes down to sleep first, then about half an hour later he’s ready for bed) and that works about half the time.  I don’t really mind if she continues to have two naps; just if they nap together it does help. Nighttime is where it’s been difficult.  S is not willing to go to sleep at 7, or even 7.30.  I wouldn’t have an issue with that - after all, I’m keen on a bedtime but I don’t mind if it has to change.  But he’s still getting up at 5, and he’s one who really needs his sleep, so it’s not working well at all.  We tried to see if we could get T off to sleep by herself (easy) by bringing S in to the loungeroom with us, but that just means he gets excited about whatever we are doing unless we are literally doing NOTHING, which means no washing up, no watching TV, no talking, nothing.  And even then, he would still be awake at 8.30 or 8.45... by which time I’m just about ready for bed myself!  So now, we go into the bedroom and read stories, and then I turn out the light, and settle down in the bedroom with them, using the hall light to write by.  As I scribble away quietly, S gradually drops off to sleep.  On a good night.  On a bad night, I have to drag him screaming back up the hallway into bed again, and again, and again, until he finally succumbs and falls asleep.  But it’s improving.  This was the fifth night we’ve been doing it, and I think we’re seeing a turnaround.  It still means that it’s nearly 8 before he sleeps, most nights, but I’m hoping that will get a bit earlier as well, and it also means I’m getting some writing done :)

- Tonight I didn’t do any writing, though, instead I continued to read American Journeys by Don Watson, which I began yesterday morning.  I’ve not read any of his work before, and I really like his writing style.  It’s a very good book.  I’m about a 5th of the way through already, and even with my speedy reading, that’s saying something (it’s saying I’m enjoying it). 

- The Colbert Report has come to ABC2, and gee, I’ve missed it.  It’s so great to see it again.  Due to aforementioned sleeping issues, we don’t often get to see it when it’s screened (at 7.30pm weeknights) but we can stream it the next day ... and because we’re with iinet, it’s unmetered content (yay).

-  Went to visit my sister and my niece and nephews on Tuesday.  Children (except T, who was not impressed AT ALL) had a great time playing with water pistols, it was fantastic.  I’m going over again next week so that we can peruse the bulb catalogue together.  We’re going to order them as one order, thus paying half postage.  Really, I need to save all the money I can right now, and it’s $12 postage since we live in neither Victoria nor NSW, and therefore have to pay quarantine inspection fee.  Pfff.

- T fell over and chipped one of her front teeth.  I am still a little devastated.  At the time I discovered it - a few hours after the event, I should add, as her teeth are not that big and she was pointing at her lip, so I checked that for a split or bleeding, and it was fine - I almost cried.  And actually I felt that way for most of the next day, as well, especially when she laughed or something and I could see it.  I know it doesn’t matter, and she hardly even smiles with all her teeth (yet) and she’ll lose this one and get a whole new one, and it doesn’t seem sore or wobbly...  just I hate that she's got a chipped tooth!  I don’t want her to get teased about it :(   S is due to go to the dentist in a few weeks, so I’ll take her along as well, and see what they say.  M, of course, thinks I’m overreacting, and worrying unnecessarily, but that’s my job, right?!!   

-  I have been through a couple of children’s healthy meals books I got a year or two ago, and am setting myself up for a fall by planning several new meals to try this week.  In fact I think I’ll probably do OK, as they’re mostly easy and I’m looking forward to introducing S to some different flavours.  He’s such a fusspot when it comes to eating, and I worry (again, unnecessarily, most probably) that he doesn’t get all he needs.  Plus I don’t want to end up being limited to a few foods he likes because I’ve not made the effort to trial his tastebuds and extend his food range.  Anyway, I’m excited about making some new things, and more excited about the fact that there will be mostly vegie stuff in there too ;)  M is fully on board with this as we need to go on a bit of a health kick; since Christmas it has been too easy to not eat well, and we all feel a lot better when we’re having better food.  All too obvious, isn’t it? 

-  I bought blueberries today because they actually had some which were WA grown (Manjimup).  Mostly I can't justify buying them because of food miles (plus they're expensive), so I was kind of chuffed to find these.  Can I just say:  yum.  S is very impressed, T not so much.  She would prefer strawberries, hence her insistence that I should remove these strange new berries, and replace them with "dor-bees".  I'm going to see if I can get some plants tomorrow to repot our strawberry pot; with any luck they should then be ready in time for S' birthday.  

-  Speaking of food miles, there were kiwifruit at the markets the other day - from Italy.  ITALY!  Seriously, people.  We just had months' worth of kiwifruit (albeit mostly from NZ, but hey).  You can't cope a few months without them and just enjoy our local summer fruit?  Mind you, it looked like they weren't selling that well, so perhaps everyone is doing just that. 

-  The ALS crew came and seemed to forgive the mess that is where we live.  It got hot by 11 and off they went, but it was fun, and good to see a few faces I’d met before, and meet some new bodies.  Also it meant I had to clean out the pergola (although I took pity on quite a few of the spiders in the corner).  On the down side, after I’d been cleaning up outside, I fell up the steps as I was running up them, and jarred my shoulder.  Over the next couple of days I cringed and whinged and realised that I’m a) unfit, and b) getting older and not quite able to bounce back from stuff like that the way I used to. 

-  I'm inspired by a piece I read in a recent Gardening Australia magazine which said that if you don't love a plant and it's not really doing the garden any good, you should just pull it out.  While we were at Bunnings the other week I got some tubestock natives (grevillias, and a couple of others) and I've planted them into bigger pots, ready to go in the ground when it cools down.  The standardised potato vine is GOING.  I'm not putting up with it for another summer.  It looks as if it's about to wither and die half the time, and then when I take pity on it and water it, it perks up and shoots out a little purple flower in thanks, which makes it seem all the more pathetic... really, it's in a very sunny spot, and I just want something I don't have to pour water on for it to not even look good.  Saying that, I have recently put some sheep manure on it and mulched it well.  We'll see when it comes to the crunch whether I have the heart to go through with actually ripping it out.  Even writing about it makes me feel sorry for the poor thing. 

-  I was watching a doco on The Khmer Rouge tonight and it got me thinking about civil war.  It’s so easy to celebrate the end of the fighting, in a civil war - well, in any war, I guess.  But in a civil war, well, we hear on TV about the end of the war, and we think, whoopee, it’s over.  But how’d you be, if you’re living in a country, where there are people in that country with whom you’ve just been fighting, whom you’ve been killing and who’ve been killing people you might know and love, and then suddenly (or over days or weeks or whatever) you just have to go back to life and kind of get over it?  How would you do that?  It’s hard enough to get on with it when there’s been an invading force, and it leaves, but when the force was there before, and is still there, and isn’t going anywhere... what do you do?  I’m ashamed to think that it’s never crossed my mind before.  Really, it would have to suck, to say the least.

And that's pretty much it, for now. 

I came across the word while I was writing my Honours thesis on Environmental Ethics.  Arne Naess, Norwegian philosopher, developed the theory (with others).  In his words:

"By an ecosophy I mean a philosophy of ecological harmony or equilibrium..." 

It was kind of a combination of philosophy (a friendly kind of love for wisdom) and eco- (the environment, the world, the home).  It immediately appealed to me, especially the 'friendly kind of love' bit.  I absolutely feel that way on a regular basis about my home, both my immediate surrounds and the wider world.  I'm both incredibly sad that so much happens to destroy it, and in awe at just how cool it is, even despite that.  /end hippy-airy-fairy-thought-bubble ;D

I have the pictures turned off on the browser because we are currently on dialup, waiting for the ADSL to kick in as of tomorrow.  We gave Telstra the flick as we could get a cheaper broadband and phone package and stuff like iView and XBL dlc is not counted towards the quota.  Although it makes me happy that we can get it cheaper, I still feel completely gipped that we get a raw deal compared with so many other countries with regards internet access (and that's not even going into the whole censorship debate). 

Anyway, I have to say, even without pictures, damn, sites take an age to load.  Oh, yeah, that is also because we are on 33.6k dialup, since that's the only modem which will work with M's PC.  Beh. I know, I know.  At least we have internet.  

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It has been disgustingly hot here yesterday and today.  I went to get fish and chips for our tea last night, and it was still 42 degrees as I was coming back - at 5.30pm.  S and T have been horrid, mostly because we haven't been able to have that much outside play time and also because they're probably not sleeping that well, either during the day, or at night.  Tonight I have the fan on in their bedroom and put the clothes horse in front of it with wet towels draped over it.  I'm not sure it makes it cooler.  It certainly makes it more humid.  I don't know if that's good or  bad, but they're both still asleep. 

This weather is frying some of the garden, whereas other bits don't seem to care as long as I give them enough water.  Once again I want to pull the tree near the letterbox out and replace it with something that doesn't require so much coddling, but I feel sorry for it, so I've just piled on more sheep manure that Dad sent down and I'll mulch it again tomorrow.  I don't think it would be quite so bad if the neighbour didn't have one exactly like it, except hers looks the picture of health.  Like most of the rest of her garden.  Especially compared to the desert that is my garden.  OK, it's not that bad, since the vincas have started flowering and I did some weeding and if I keep throwing the water from the aircon onto the succulent creeper, it may not die.  I really, really want my garden to be green.  It allows me to keep my sanity, knowing that that green will be there, even through long, hot February.  I think perhaps I'm just kind of stingey with how much water I want to spend on it.  

In any case, I'm going to mow the lawn on Wednesday (it's going to be 37 tomorrow, so I won't be dancing about outside for long once the sun is up) and I think it will make the whole place look a lot better.  Which it needs to, since the ALS crew are coming for brunch/morning tea on Saturday.  Right now I must admit I'm starting to regret offering to host the meet... but I'm sure by then I'll have the place looking acceptable (or at least the bits that they're going to see!!)  It was a good excuse to get my act together and clean up anyway.  Since this is the Year of Making The House Look Better, perhaps it will start me off on the right foot and we'll actually get stuff organised, put away, given away or sold.  This is in the hopes that in two years we'll hopefully be selling the house, so I'd like to kind of get to a point that we can enjoy it a little before we do that.  

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Damn, for not having updated for a month, I'm certainly not that inspired.  In other news, having M home is generally all the time, amazingly, exceptionally* great, since we have been to the park heaps, and he's played with S and T a lot, and we've been able to spend some quality time with just the two of us, which we haven't really been able to do since... S was born, I think!  Although it kind of sucks that he doesn't have another job as yet, the pluses outweigh the minuses, mostly because we still haven't run out of money from his redundancy, so are not yet destitute.  Perhaps the biggest plus of all is that I discovered that we still get along really well, and are actually great friends, which is kind of hard to remember, sometimes, in amongst the whole working/parenting bs that goes on.  Not that parenting is bs, but you have to be "in the moment" a lot with children, I've discovered, and that means sometimes that you don't have a lot of moments left for each other.  

The work side of thing is the heavy bit.  If he doesn't get anything soon I will really have to go back to work.  So far I'm just going to try for relief, in full realisation that I have (somewhat deliberately) left it a bit too late to get a posting, and if the truth be known, I'd really rather he worked.  Although part of me does wonder what it would be like, to be able to go to work all day and leave him at home to look after the children and do the housework.  This is kind of the of not-very-nice-vindictive part of me, though :P because I think that perhaps he would be in for a rude shock as to how much energy you need to do both.  The ultimate aim for us is that he can work and I can stay home, since I can't imagine either of us would be completely happy, if the roles were reversed. 

Perhaps the only other thing which is strange, now that he's home, is the lack of routine.  I find us staying up late, even when I know the children will be up achingly early, and I have a hard time just going to bed and doing my normal morning, afternoon and evening stuff.  It's not that I have such a strict routine when he's working, but it's still my routine, and I'm thrown a bit, now it's no longer there.  I've writing that I want/need to get done, I never seem to complete the washing up before the next meal produces more, and the clean washing pile is slowly taking over our bedroom, to the point that if I don't do something about it soon, it will no longer be clean washing, just extra padding for our bed.  There are surely clothes at the bottom of the basket(s) which we either no longer fit, or have forgotten we own.  I'm a little afraid as to what I might find, if I delve too deeply. 

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Finally, S tells me today (after I've made him a sandwich with multigrain bread):  "Mummy!  You forgot to take the pips out!  Silly Mummy..." 


*should probably have waiting until he was not reading over my shoulder before posting this - hence edited version, according to M.

I love my children just so damned much. Sometimes it's hard to remember that in the midst of a tantrum (either mine or theirs) but when I check in on them, every night before I go to bed myself, their sleeping forms give me a feeling which is akin to glee, contentment and tenderness, all at once.
 

T is talking all the time now.  Mostly only I can understand her, but it means that we're able to have conversations which involve lots of laughing, and one-word exchanges.  She's often able to make herself understood (again, pretty much only to me).  Tonight she was singing 'Twinkle, twinkle' and got through almost all of the song - diction isn't so great (read: the only thing she pronounces is "up a-" from the line "up above", and all the rest is "ba-ba-ba") but the tune isn't bad.  I'm trying to teach it to S on the piano and he recognises the tune and can do the first four notes... not about to declare either as musical genius material, but it's cool that they enjoy it. 


S is completely the parrot, but is also starting to come up with some wacky stuff all on his own, and it makes me laugh, several times a day. 

Recent comments:
-  Me on the phone to Big W: "Hi, I was wondering if you have any Christmas trees right now?"
-  S: "And presents!!"

-  He calls the Christmas tree, "the Father Christmas Tree" which is just fantastic.

-  T fell over recently in the loungeroom and he went over to try and kiss her better (!) and then rubbed her back and said, "You ok, little one?"

-  He told me this morning "T is disappointed."  WTF?  You're two.  It's a four-syllable word.  Stop learning stuff like that or you'll freak out the other two-year-olds.  (BTW she was "disappointed" because I wouldn't let her have the full cereal box to play with.  Mean Mummy).

-  He can count to 12, plus he can comprehend quantity up to 5 objects (after that he gets a little fuzzy, which is fair enough).  He recognises "S" and knows its sound.  He's more hit than miss with colours. 

-  We ducked out to get a few things from the deli tonight (their milk is cheaper than the supermarket) and an older man held the door open for us, and I thanked him (I was holding S' hand with one hand and steering the pram with the other, and possibly could have managed the door too - I'm nothing if not a Multi-Tasking Goddess - but it was very nice to not have to) and S commented that he had held the door, and I said, yes, he was a gentleman.  

S:  He a genta...  
Me:  A gentleman.  That's a man who is thoughtful and kind and helps people.  I'm sure you will be a gentleman when you grow up too.  
S:  I a gentleman!  
Me:  Well, yes, you could be now, when you're thoughtful and kind and nice, like that man was.  
S:  Yes, and he didn't hit us.  

O_o

We then chatted a little about how people don't generally hit you when you're out in public.  I'm sure it's more to do with us telling him that hitting isn't very gentle or kind, ie you shouldn't hit me/your sister/the dog and in that sense it's logical.  Did make me skip a beat, though :)  And laugh. 

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I'm really excited about Christmas.  When I was food shopping the other day there were little plush Makka Pakkas in the toy section and so I popped one in the trolley as an extra present for T... she is Night Garden CRAZY at the moment, so I'm kind of happy that I got her the little books too.  We got out the toys, books and games we have for them while they were away at their last daycare day for the year, and honestly, I wish we could have bought them more.  But M said, "We could earn 10 times what we earn (earnt?!) now, and we would still have to budget for Christmas, and draw a line somewhere as to what they could and couldn't have."  He's right.  People go crazy at Christmas, some of whom have no money to do it, I mean, they go into debt because of it, and I can't justify that.  I guess it's easy to get caught up in the hype that presents=love and really, they have low expectations because it's not like they get showered with gifts all the time.  I think they will enjoy their presents, and I'm so excited about getting everything ready and stuffing their stockings, and blowing up balloons, and just all the things that make the day fun and amazing and something to look forward to.  It's so great celebrating special days with young children.  

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There's a bookshop closing down in a shopping centre where we shop sometimes, and as a result the books are 70% off.  Heh heh.  So far I've bought five (only) but I may have to visit again tomorrow.  The words of Rory McLeod ring in my ears* but they have many books I've previously owned but for some reason or another don't anymore, or ones I've wanted to own but never had the money to get.  Not that we have loads of cash now, but I'm talking REALLY cheap... like, less than $3 per good quality paperback.  The other day I bought a Neil Gaiman novel (yes, novel!  No pictures... it looks interesting), and The Secret River (shortlisted for Man Booker last year, Australian historical fiction).  Yesterday, I bought:

The Beauty Myth (never read it, shame on me).
My Invented Country - Isabel Allende
The Sleep of the Dead - Tom Bradby

and...

The Book of Mormon. 

Because education is only valuable if it is broad ;P

I ummed and ahhed over whether I wanted to spend my hard-saved money on it, but it ended up being $2.40, so I caved.
I am going to wrap it to give M as a Christmas present.  Hahahahahaha :D

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Speaking of broadness of education, shortly after Obama won the election, I wrote to John McCain to congratulate him on his excellent (seriously, no sarcasm here) concession speech and thus I am on his mailing list.  I could obviously opt out at any time, but I like to get the updates occasionally.  It gives me an insight in American politics that I just don't get from the local news.  The other day he sent an email around.  This is it:



My Friend,

Over the past month, my colleagues and I have debated a number of our country's most pressing issues in the Senate. Issues like health care reform, the war in Afghanistan and our nation's economic recovery are at the forefront of our discussions.

I have taken an active role in finding solutions to these challenges in Washington, but I know that Congress never has all the answers. And before the Senate goes into recess for the holiday season, I want to know what you think about these issues.

That's why I'm asking for your opinion. We've put together a short American Issues Survey for you to fill out and I ask that you take a moment to do so today.

As a Senator, I rely on feedback from my constituents in Arizona and my supporters across the country. I need your feedback to continue serving as a voice for conservative values. Please share your opinions through the American Issues Survey by following this link.

I sincerely value your opinion and want to hear from you. I know we are entering a busy time for many - as you prepare to spend the holidays with your family- and that's why we've shortened the survey to only nine questions. Please take the survey and submit your responses today.

It's hard to believe that we are just around the corner from another election year. And as we prepare our campaign for 2010, I am reaching out to you for your support. After filling out our survey, you will have the opportunity to make a contribution to my campaign. I ask that you give as generously as you can, so I can continue my service to the people of Arizona and conservatives nationwide.

I thank you again for your time and I hope you have a wonderful holiday season.

Sincerely,

John McCain

P.S. I want to know where you stand on critical issues like the health care reform bill, the war in Afghanistan, and the economy. That's why our campaign has put together the American Issues Survey. Will you follow this link to take the survey today? After sharing your thoughts, I ask that you make a generous contribution to my reelection campaign to help us distribute this survey to fellow conservatives across the country.

Now, I'm not going to take the survey, because it's not really up to me, an Australian who doesn't even live in America, to put forth what I think about these issues... at least not in a survey.  But damn, how stupid are the people to whom you are writing, John, if you have to give them seven - SEVEN!! - links to the same page to get them to take the survey?!! This is not counting the two other options you have if you click in the box to the side of the body of the email (which didn't come out in my c&p).  So, nine links all together, two them Big Red Buttons.  Either your audience is apathetic or kind of dim, or they're neither, and you're just insulting them.  It's a worry. 

*"when you're starving, books mean nothing" - Inspector Man

I guess I used to think so, but I've kind of realised that relationships are so much more complex than I once thought... shades of grey, you know? That's not such a bad thing, though. I think it makes them more interesting and allows for more depth. I would withhold information rather than lying outright, though :) if they're even two different things! Sometimes you also have to wonder if there's going to be more harm than good to come of the honesty. I suppose it all comes down to the individual relationship (which is a bit of a cop-out, sorry!)

Today was M's last day at work. We went to pick him up and then went to the doctor (his ankles, S' rash - both nothing to worry about). His boss came out to shake his hand, and say goodbye to me. It was a little sad, really.

I rang the FAO to tell them about M's job situation, and the guy I spoke to was incredibly helpful. He patiently went through all the things we can do and are entitled to, as well as who I need to call to clarify tax on redundancy payments, etc. He also told me that there are lots of resources through them and other organisations with which they're affiliated, and not to hesitate to call if we found things were getting a bit tight. I don't think it will come to that, because we're pretty experienced in tightening our belts, but it's good to know that we have it if we need it. We even still get the subsidised child care, which I am just so, so happy about, because I know I'm spoilt to have it, but without it, I might possibly go mad... especially if M is home all the time too ;) It's a real luxury having those 7 hours a week without the children, and I value it more than I could ever have imagined.

I got off the phone feeling grateful that I live in a country where there is this safety net available to us. I know there are some idiots who take advantage of it, but damn, there are places where if you lose your job, you lose your house, and have to borrow from shady loan sharks to keep your head above water... I'm just feeling lucky that it's not something we even have to consider.


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Still on money-related stuff, I changed insurance companies yesterday, and had to spend about two hours on the phone talking to reps about their various deals. Most amusing was one who was very reluctant to give me a quote for the low amount of contents we wanted to insure.

"I'm just really afraid you're going to under-insure," he told me. "What about your clothes, your children's clothes?"

I tried to keep the smile out of my voice as I explained that we didn't own that many, and the children's clothes were almost 100% hand-me-downs from friends and relatives, which we could easily get again, free or almost free.

"But as an insurance company, we can't insure that. It's new for old, so you would have to estimate how much you would need to replace them."

I explained that we wouldn't want to buy them new. We just wouldn't claim for them.

"But you can't really do that."

When I asked why not, he explained that it was dangerous to under-insure, and then kind of changed the subject by telling me that an average Australian couple - "just two people!" - owned $80 000 worth of contents. I explained that we weren't average :)

"But what about your outdoor furniture? Barbecue? Children's play equipment?"

Hmm, that would be: nope, nope and nope. The children do have stuff to play with outside - Tonka toys, etc - but again, all free and easily obtained free again. No swings or slides - not really enough room, plus they go to the park regularly where there far better ones than we could afford or fit in our yard. Besides, most of the time they're helping weed the garden or playing with leaves... but I decided not to go into that. The thing that made me almost laugh out loud was having him describe the accommodation allowance:

"If your house should burn down or be so damaged that you had to move out while it was being rebuilt, we would find you alternative accommodation and cover the costs of that for 12 months. And this is a proper house - with room for your pets and everything - not just a unit..."


Right... so our unit, where we currently live, is obviously not "a proper house" - I was almost tempted to take out insurance with them, burn our house down, and then see what kind of grandeur we could live in while it was being rebuilt.

Needless to say, we went with someone else. Who was friendlier, didn't question how much we owned or wanted to insure, and came in cheaper with a lower excess. Win all round, really.

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Speaking of insurance (I'm really linking in my topics tonight, aren't I?!), the fence guys came today, and fixed the fence, which I kind of hope does all kinds of good things for my neighbour's mental health. I have to drop the cheque into the bank tomorrow so I can actually pay for it.

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It's 11pm. I really think I should go to bed. After a quick game of Jewel Quest, of course :)

I wanted to put this behind a cut, but it didn't seem to like it. So just skip over if, you want. Lots of talking about me, really.

Just over the past months I just can't be bothered to get upset about what other people choose to do in their lives. I mean, I'm still horrified at unprovoked violent attacks, or child and animal abuse, or blatant environmental destruction by a company which will get fined some pittance in comparison to its yearly revenue... but as far as other things go, I just find I'm really not that interested. It doesn't really even seem worth it. People work fulltime to buy things they don't need? Can't be bothered worrying about it. People buying too much junk food and not enough fruit? Can't be bothered worrying about it. That kind of thing. You get the idea.

And I feel a little ... foolish? that I have been so judgmental in the past. It's not that I care less about the things which are important to me, it's just that I care less about whether they're important to others. There is only so much I can do to convince someone of the value and validity of what I hold dear - and even then, I have to take into consideration that which s/he holds dear, too. Take cloth nappies. I think it does make a difference to the environment to use them. I would love it if my sister used them, and all my friends. But they don't (mostly) and you know, I am OK with that, now. If they see me using them and ask about them, I just talk about them, and the benefits, but with no sort of "you should be doing this", because I think it's annoying to be lectured to, and it's a little demeaning. Lead by example, that's where I'm wanting to come from now.

Another example: one of my neighbours uses her air-con so much and I shudder to think how much power that saps, with all its environmental implications. And it still bothers me a little, when I go outside and it's a beautiful cool morning/evening, and if she had the windows open, the house would cool down in no time. But you know, she has a chronic illness, and she also works as a carer for severely disabled, terminal patients. And I really value the fact that she goes to work everyday and does something that I couldn't do - I don't have the emotional strength for that. Maybe it's OK that she runs the air-con more than we do? It's certainly not going to change anything if I get upset about it.

I guess in the end, it probably does make me a bit apathetic, but in this country that might not be so bad. Too much passion can be scarey. Also, if I use less energy worrying about what everyone else is doing to meet my standards, I can put more energy into trying to meet them myself. Mostly, people are trying to do the best they can. Me walking up to them and saying, "BAD, BAD, BAD!" is pretty much pointless, I reckon.

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And now for something completely different: M's job. He's finishing up as of Tuesday; no job to go to as yet. I'm a little terrified at the prospect, but only a little. Thankfully the redundancy payment is reasonable and we will be OK over Christmas. It would have been really great to have continuous employment, but I guess that's just not going to happen. I started applying through the Dept website but I'm holding off for now; will wait until early Jan to see how work goes for M, and if nothing comes up, then I'll finish the application. Having to pay for all the bureaucratic rubbish such as police clearances and transcripts will be pointless if I don't end up having to work - money down the drain, really, and that's not really an option right now.

However, I'm still going Christmas shopping tomorrow, and since we have a fairly tight budget for presents anyway, we're sticking (mostly) with what we'd planned. I'm getting a Warm Earth subscription (ordered it tonight) and I'm so excited :)

Ooh, and before I forget, S had his first visit with Father Christmas today! He was pretty nervous and didn't really want to sit on his knee, which I thought was fair enough, since this is the first time S has seen him "in the flesh" but he did ask for a tool kit, and said, "I two!" when asked his age, so I was pretty impressed. We didn't bother with a photo - thought the pressure might be a bit too much. Then we went and bought a few groceries, and S had a HUGE tantrum all the way out to the car because I wouldn't let him ride on Thomas. I received lots of sympathy looks from other parents who've obviously been there, but gee, I'm looking forward to this phase where he is Completely Unreasonable to be over. Oh, and he can stop fiercely resisting nap/bedtime pretty much whenever he wants too; that would be great.

So finally it is sorted, what is happening at Christmas, and I am Happy. We will be staying here and Mum and Dad will come to visit, to bring presents for the children, and then we'll have an early tea. Other plans include watching DVDs and playing in the garden, cricket if weather permits (ie, not ridiculously stinking hot).

I hope this can set some kind precedent so that it's not expected that we do much at Christmas... I just want to be with my little family and don't really care for the whole huge dinner with relatives. Quiet and just us - that's what I'd like. Anyway, that's the stress about it over for another year. I guess we'll see what happens next year.

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Copenhagen has started and I don't want to hope too much; I'm trying to see what I can find to read from a few different sources but I suspect that it will all be fairly sanitised news regardless of where I get it, so really it makes little difference. In any case, it's only just begun, so time will tell.

I somehow feel like I'm writing in cliches today.

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We went to a pre-schoolers vegie garden workshop today at Environment House. Heaps of fun for T and S, and then I sat around afterwards with Brenda and the crew and talked about Petra Kelly and other green things, while my children tried to destroy the shop O_o Also bought clove oil to have a go at killing the bathroom mould once and for all.

It was very relaxing at EH; their garden is small but productive, with lots of compost bins and different fruit trees, and vegies. S especially seemed to feel right at home and impressed all and sundry with his parrot-talk [the other side of this is, he was playing with T in the lounge room recently and said, "JESUS CHRIST!"... quite honestly, I have absolutely no idea where he picked that up. I mean, I might say, "Jesus!" if I saw a car accident or something, or something scared me, but really, I don't often even use that, let alone the blasphemy in its entirety :) I mean, if it were "FUCK!!" or "GOD DAMNIT!", well I could kind of understand it, but hey, I guess that's toddlers for you]

T toddled around as well, all pink-hatted and bare-footed, and kept pointing out the flowers (and saying "Fowers!" - her newest word), and was generally quite happy to leave my side and use the little watering cans to half drown the seedlings and water the mulch, but nobody seemed to care :)

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In other news, I slept on my neck badly last night and now am so stiff I can barely move. What I hate about this kind of stiff-pain is that it's exhausting. I'm so over today, and it's only 3.15 ... I have leftovers in the fridge and I think that's going to be the plan for tea as I cannot even fathom thinking of what we'll have otherwise, let alone making it. Thankfully, though, S has slept for a good three hours, which he desperately needed - I think I might possibly have gone insane if he refused to sleep/nap like he has done the last couple of days. Normally such a good sleeper, when he isn't, I don't quite know what to do with myself (or him).

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That's all for now - S calling, back another day with news of M's work (hopefully good, by then - not this job, but another one).

because I should be writing.

1. Why is that some Australians cannot seem to get their head around the fact that the Liberal party is not "liberal", it is conservative? So if you are on Facebook and have Joe Hockey as one of your friends, and also describe your political persuasion as Very Liberal, you look like a twat, OK?

2. I just about had an accident this morning on the way to the markets because a stupid young woman in a hatchback (not trying to demonise young women or hatchbacks, just setting the scene) didn't give way at a give way sign, and then preceded to ignore the fact that I had to slam on my brakes and the car behind me narrowly avoided rear-ending me. Hence I held my hand on the horn for a little longer than was probably necessary. All I want is a wave to say sorry, to acknowledge she was in the wrong, you know? Stupid.

3. There is a sign on the wall at the markets, where the fruit and veg trucks park to deliver their wares to the stall-holders. It says "Don't even THINK of parking here. Thank you." It makes me chuckle every time I visit.

4. Finally, I think we may have the fence sorted out, or at least, the cheque from the insurance agent is "in the mail". The assessor came round the other day. How's this for funny - when I introduced myself, he said, "Ah yes!" And then preceded to say my whole name, and the town I'm from (originally). He remembers me from 16 years ago, when he was on the Rotary committee when I applied to go to Germany. So we talked all about the exchange, and children, and study, and school, and he went and had a look at the fence, and said that it should all be fine (which it is) and then I offered him a cup of tea, which he accepted, and it was all dandy. Again, worrying works, because I had spent the morning cleaning and tidying as I was certain he would think we were dodgy since the lawn needs mowing, and the garden needs weeding, and well, the suburb we live in... another person was stabbed in the park a few weeks ago. Really. It brings the whole place down. I think they should consider that before pulling knives on each other.

It was a big brown one, with wings, and he caught it in a glass because it was in the bathroom and he didn't want it to get squashed. He came out and gave it to me, and I went outside and emptied it gently onto the back step. It spread its little brown wings, and off it flew! ...

... right into a spider web, where it was quickly immobilised and wrapped up by a big, black spider. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what happens in nature sometimes. The end.

- went to the markets Friday morning and got heaps of fruit, eggs, vegies. Managed to fit in a walk with M and the Big C, plus food shopping and M bought Fable II, which looks good, but which I doubt I'll ever have time in the next 5 years to play.

- met up with Kat, another Wrimo, in Leederville. Managed to write just over 1k, despite quite a bit of chatting :)

- have hit over 26k, which is WAAAY less than I need to have written by now, but I'm going to continue plugging away. I've come this far, won't do to give up now.

- S and T watched 'rage' on Saturday afternoon, while I wrote and pottered in the kitchen, and S learnt the words to Daft Punk's Around the World... I know, he's a genius ;P

- had a good nap on Saturday afternoon, which I very much needed after a horror night where S woke up numerous times. Really, there were too many to count. I think I'm still feeling the after-effects now.

- went to the car boot sale in Morley this morning, bought a frangipani (yay) and a little shade-loving thing that we used to have heaps of in Subi, but which I planted out, mostly, in the cull when we moved. I'll divide it up and put some in the pergola and some under the tree near the chook pen.

- also bought two LM Montgomery books, plus two other young adult/teen novels, under the guise of putting them aside for S and T. Apparently I am far more transparent than I realised, nobody was fooled by this ruse, and I've hidden them from myself so that I won't be distracted (reading when I should be writing).

- Miko Takahashi has a sore paw - her claw looks damaged. I'm keeping an eye on it; it appears to be getting better, but I was patting her this afternoon and noticed that one of the scabs she had on the back of her neck was looking a bit off, so pulled it off as the vet's told me to do, and sure enough, infection. Cleaned it just a bit for her and put some Betadine in there... looks pretty clean now but I'll see how she's doing in the morning. She's been brawling a bit lately - she's such an alley cat. And so fluffy and unassuming, otherwise. *sigh*

- got to talk to Meredith on the phone, we'll be catching up with her and J on Thursday! Yay! S will love it, I'm sure.

- S asks me everyday if we're going to see Father Christmas today. And he's worked out what he wants ... he saw it on the back of the box of his Plan Toys Parking Garage. I was kind of hoping he'd forget it, but this is what he has already:




and this is what he wants:



This is despite the fact that he already has a train set, which is compatible with the garage, and lots of trains, and oh... that the Railway set pictured above costs three hundred dollars!! I hate to disappoint him, when he's not even three yet, but seriously, this is not the Christmas where we will be spending $300 on one present for him. I'm hoping to distract him from the fact with lots and lots of balloons.

The pile of dishes in the sink is slightly smaller than it was last night, and with any luck, I'll get through them tonight; I had a nap earlier while M played with the children and feel so much better for it. I've been so tired the last couple of days, you know, as in I can't even get motivated to do much more than very basic around the house stuff, and want to sleep all afternoon - so I went and got myself some iron tablets because experience tells me this kind of tired only seems to happen when I'm
a) low in iron, or
b) pregnant,
and option b) is not really an option for me right now. (Mind you, if it doesn't improve after a few days on the tablets, I really will start to wonder... but highly unlikely, thank goodness. Not saying it would be awful, just... not ideal).

Had a really great CFF yesterday. M's boss dropped him off after work, so we didn't get to do our big mammoth walk like we usually do. Instead we had a quick lunch and then went food shopping, where I spent surprisingly little, but got all the stuff I needed. Mind you, I had already been to the supermarket earlier, after dropping the children off at daycare, and bought essentials for lunch (and some rather non-essential cake), so I guess it all evens out.

It struck me as I was chopping up mushrooms while preparing dinner last night (homemade chicken korma with basmati rice and chapatis), that despite Woolworths telling me over and over how they are "the Fresh Food People", it really is not how I see them. I don't think of fresh food when I go to the supermarket - that's what the market is for. The supermarket conjures up images of dry food, ie flour, pasta, all the pantry stuff like oil and baked beans, etc. And cat litter, and toilet paper. Not fresh food. I don't know if I'm the only person for which their ad campaign doesn't ring true, but I suspect not. Speaking of Woolworths, I signed up for their loyalty programme a while back because it was free, and we do shop there more than we do at Coles. And of course, when I remember to get it scanned, what I buy goes onto their databank. Sometimes, they send me emails with specials, and they're targetted advertising, because they know what I've bought in the past. I know it's because all the stuff I've bought is on their records, and really, some of the things are helpful. For example, I send disposables to daycare with T and S, and they sent me a special which gave me $6 off for every pack I bought. Which was very handy, because they're not the cheapest brand (Naturecare, a Swedish brand, which for some bizarre reason are made in Israel. Go figure. Anyway, slightly more environmentally friendly than most, I hope). So, I know the reason they're sending me the specials (to get me to buy more) and how they got the information (I gave it to them)... and I still find it a little creepy. It's the paranoid "someone is watching you" gene, I suppose.

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M is slightly obsessed with moving to New Zealand at the moment, mostly because we could have more house and land for our money over there than we could over here, especially considering the places we would like to live, over here. If not New Zealand, then Tasmania. The difference in houses seems to be: in Tasmania you can get something for a lot less, but it's not necessarily the kind of house you would like to live in. I mean, you can buy a 4x2 on a fairly large block for under $150k... but you'd have to do major renovations. And I'm not really into that. The New Zealand properties, on the other hand, are usually under $300k, but are a lot more "European" in appearance; some of them are just gorgeous (don't get me wrong, some of the Tasmanian ones are gorgeous too). And the beauty of both of these places - awesome. However: cold. One of the places on the South Island had an average winter daytime temperature of 12 degrees C. That is only 12 degrees above FREEZING. And it is the average, so there will be days when it is much colder. M quite airily said that he's fine with that. I am not so fine with that. But anyway, it's all a bit of a moot point, since we would have to sell this place first, and we don't intend to do this until we've been here for at least 5 years, so that we can have paid off a decent amount. Hopefully by that stage it will be worth a little more, too.

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Other random:

- T said her first "sentence" the other day, ie two words joined together. "More cake". :P
- Went to visit Mum and Dad in the unit where they're staying and S and Dad had a wonderful time at three different parks. T showed off how well she can sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star."
- Spent almost two hours in the garden with S today (T went for a nap half-way through) and managed to plant out philodendron, baby's tears, and move little creeping plant whose name I've forgotten. We have fruit (or veges, depending on which side of the fence you sit in that debate) on the tomato plants, and the passionfruit is going off - loads of fruit and flowers, and I think some of them will ripen by Christmas. Repotted impatiens, and a few other tiny cheapies I bought from the car boot sale recently, and with tomorrow another mild day, I'll plant out the vincas and petunias near the roses.
- Really, really behind in Nano, but this week coming up is going to be a lot less hectic than last week, when we were out pretty much every day, so hopefully will be able to catch up then.

S really wants to help with stuff like housework at the moment, which I completely want to foster, but of course, there are some things which really just make a lot more work for me if he tries to do them.  But he can do things like use the dustpan and brush to help sweep the floor, and stuff, and his latest big thing is the washing up.  And first of all there's the thing of falling off the chair or stool when he's standing at the sink (which he's done on more than one occasion, I might add - thankfully I was right there both times to catch him) plus, when I say I want to do the washing up, I actually need to do it, rather than have him play in lukewarm water with fairly clean dishes.

So I put down a towel we were going to wash anyway, and half fill a big bowl of water, with a bit of handwash so there's bubbles, and then get him to sit on it and give him a whisk and a colander, and a a few small containers that he can fill up and tip out again, and because he's on the towel, the floor doesn't get too slippery... and when he's finished, I just get on the towel with bare feet and skate all around the kitchen, thereby washing the floor :) 

Smiles all round.

360.  This week it's about a programme which tries to assist in helping prisoners to connect with their children, whom they hardly see.  The prisoners record storybooks and the CDs are sent to their children, with copies of the books, so the children can listen to their parent read, while they read along.  What made me cry was Troy, whose children liked the last book so much, they put it on their MP3 player, and they listen to it on the way to school... just sad and touching at the same time.

is taking up a lot of my time.  I'm at 5k, which is really good for me, considering previous years, and it puts me about right for the date.  I'm also trying to keep on top of the garden, the housework, and feed us relatively healthy meals.  Oh, and I probably should parent now and then, too. 

But it's 11pm now, and I have a feeling I'm losing my voice, so hopefully if I go to bed now, I'll gain it back overnight.